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The Importance of Branding Yourself and Some Guiding Questions For You Who Haven’t
I had a buddy in high school who used to fire bottle rockets out of his hindquarters, had people pay him to watch get crazy piercings and would get naked parties because he was the “fat naked guy.” This was his brand. I won’t give his nickname as to not incriminate him, he’s changed very much from those days. His brand was the big naked crazy guy. He was also one of my buds.
I have another very close person in my life who grew up in apartheid Zimbabwe. He couldn’t walk on the sidewalk until he was 14 years old. He was the only black kid in his high school and he had to bust his ass through primary school to have an inkling of a chance to even get to high school. Then to get to college, this guy organized a 120+ kilometer run (just over 3 marathons) over the course of 3 days from his high school to the country’s capital to raise money for an orphanage. He didn’t realize when he was organizing this run that a scholarship would be the result, but it was!
This guy branded himself as the guy who will get shit done. By 27, apartheid was lifted and he ran a company with 4,000 employees. By 40, he chaired multiple publicly traded companies and by 50 he retired. His brand was that of an executive. He was a leader. He was a capitalist. He told me that he branded himself as all of these things early and he never stopped!
We are all responsible for the brand we want to project for ourselves. This is something we need to start thinking about now and forever. What do we want to be, how do we want to be perceived and how are we going to start projecting that image out to the world?
This is not something we are taught in school and I think it’s a shame. Our brand is our everything. Who the hell are you?! If this is something you haven’t thought about, it’s something you must begin to think about. We are one in a world of billions. We are competing for jobs, attention and resources. What are you going to contribute? What are you going to create or what are you going to add value to?
If you haven’t started to think about your personal brand, I want to give you a homework assignment. This is real, it’s grown up shit! If you want to grow and compete, you need to start thinking about this.
Here it is, before you do anything else, write down these questions and answer them.
- Do you have a superpower? Is there something you can do better than anyone else, or even better than most?
- If you could picture your dream self in 5 years, what would that dream self look like? This could be physical, mental, financial, social or all.
- What do people praise you for and what do you want to be praised for?
- What gets you fired up? What makes you the most excited version of you?
- Now, a bit deeper into the woods — How do I define myself and why do I matter?
- What’s my mission in life and what do I believe in?
- Finally, what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?
Answer these questions and remember, we are the authors of our own destiny. We can be the crazy naked guy at parties or we can run industries, let’s go make something happen!
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16 Things to think about when deciding where to live as an adult
“Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.”
Have you ever thought about why you live where you do? Have you ever thought about moving to create opportunities. Most people end up where they are because of a job, college or it’s simply where they’re from.
In any given year, 9.8% of Americans move. 20% of those folks move to a new state.
Currently, my family and I are considering a move to TX. This is a pure economic & opportunity choice. I’ve personally lived in Indiana, southern CA and New York City. My heart has always led me back to Southern CA because of the weather. However, with my life now belonging to my family, it’s time to think about things different.
These are the things I think you should consider (and I’m considering now) when picking a new place to call home.
1. What part of town do I want to live?
2. What will I gain living in this part of town rather than elsewhere?
3. Is this place going to be somewhere I enjoy living?
4. What actions can I take to start building a social network?
5. What are my professional or entrepreneurial opportunities?
6. Can I rent the lifestyle that I want?
- Rent = not own home
7. Can I own the lifestyle that I want?
- Own = Own home
8. Will the weather here drive me to be unhappy for any extended period of time?
9. If I have kids, is this place going to allow my children the opportunity to thrive?
- Great schools, diverse extracurricular opportunities, parks and cool, unique things to do with kiddos
10. If I need to travel, will it be easy to do from here?
11. Where can I become involved in some sort of civic action?
12. How’s the food scene?
13. Are there enough things to keep me (and the family) entertained (sports, theater, culture, etc…)
14. Will I meet a diverse subset of people here?
15. How do you envision things at there worst living here?
16. How do you envision things at there best?
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25 things I’ve learned in my first 7 months of being a dad
1. Baby poop is ever changing and this is something every parent observes
2. Babies can eat normal food before they have teeth, such as strawberries, eggs and even little pieces of meat or chicken legs!
3. The parent taking care of the baby full time, at anytime, has the harder job
- I said this to be nice when my wife was on maternity, but when I got to paternity, I realized work was actually an escape
4. My time is no longer mine
5. Before your baby crawls, parenting is less intense. Once they crawl, you’re now in charge of preventing accidents and worst.
- I hear this amplifies with walking and talking
6. The best part of my day is when I get to snuggle with baby and we knowingly enjoy each other’s company
7. My long term thinking has changed completely
8. I think about fitness to chase my kids around and be able to keep up with them for a longer period of time
9. The baby industrial complex makes something for everything baby
10. Baby proofing homes has yet to become high tech
- Business idea – smart baby proof doors that can be all turned on and all turned off at the same time
11. If baby is crying, you’ll literally do anything to stop it
12. Everything you once judged parents for (binkie from floor to mouth, screens, baby covered in food), you end up doing
13. Anything you can do to make your child laugh, you will do repeatedly
14. I will compete to have papa as the first word out of baby’s mouth
15. I should have gotten a night nurse and I will for #2!
16. Much of what used to matter no longer does
17. Babies will pee on you many times during diaper changes – this is temporary
18. Babies are supposed to sleep on their backs until they can roll, then they mostly sleep on their stomach
19. Doing things with baby is always scary the first time, then becomes part of life – this ranges from going out to eat to traveling
20. Hangovers are no longer worth the price
21. Happiness is baby noises (koos, bahs and aaaahs)
22. Most of what gets us aggressive in life never changes – you’re hungry, tired or need to use the restroom
23. Naps are gods gift, both taking them and when baby takes them
- When the baby is new, you sleep when baby sleeps
24. You reflect on teaching someone else on how to be a good person and remember they’re going to watch you and model these behaviors
25. Being a dad is the best!
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Daily Feed, Sleep & Diaper Tracker for Baby
As a new parent, it can be tough to keep track of everything your baby is doing, especially if your sharing duties between Mom, Dad, family or hired help such as a doula in the early days or a nanny in the later days. My wife put together this tracker initially when we first brought on a nanny for our son Jameson. We found it was super helpful to know how much he was eating, sleeping and yes, pooping and peeing! It also gave a sense of accountability to our nanny. She took it personally to know he was eating the amount mom demanded!
This tracker can be printed and used day to day. I recommend it!
Daily Log for Baby
Today’s Date:_______________
Notes for Mom and Dad:
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I: Feeding
# Time Amount (oz) Comments: (Real Foods, formula or breast milk) 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 II: Diaper Changes
# Time Wet Dirty Notes (odd colors / odors / trends) 1 2 3 4 5 6 III: Naps
# Start Time End TIme Location (Crib, Stroller, Car Seat) 1 2 3 4 -
Things We Should Think About As Adults
- The future and our place in it
- Investing and if we’re not active – passively investing with low cost index funds
- What’s the best diet for me
- Am I doing things to stretch my limits?
- Am I buying things I can’t afford?
- Am I taking care of my physical and mental health?
- Am I living life sustainability?
- Am I reading and continuing to educate myself
- Am I creating multiple income streams
- Why am I trying to keep up with the Joneses
- Am I an independent thinker and voter
- Am I Representing myself as a brand
- Do I want to change my brand
- Why would I be afraid of strangers
- What is the norm and status quo? Do I want to change these?
- How can I execute on more ideas with actions
- How can I practice moderation?
- How old was I when I started believing music from a certain era was best and everything that came after was crap. (If you don’t understand this, I envy your youth)
- Am I spending more hours watching other people living their lives on TV and not living my own?
- Am creating my own reality?
- Am I happy and if not what am I doing to make myself happy? If I am, can I do more of it?
- If I know pushing my limits physically makes me better, how can I do this mentally?
- How much money did luxury brands pay rappers to teach me about high end champagne and luxury automobiles
- How can I travel more and see more?
- Why aren’t I writing weird lists and posting them for public consumption
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It’s not what you know, but what you can learn
The odds are stacked against the fact that we’ll be doing in 20 years what we are doing today. Do you remember the days before the internet? I barely do, and I was born in 1980! When was the last time you saw a horse and buggy or an employed horse shoe maker. We hear the myth of the coal miner, but I know a hell of a lot more opportunities in solar.
Can you imagine the technology we’re going to have in 20 years? We won’t have to drive our own cars. Do you think that is unbelievable? Tesla’s already drive themselves! They’re also putting self driving trucks on the road. Are you a professional truck driver? I’d start training for an alternative career now so you are prepared when it happens.
In order to be prepared for the future, you have to prepare for the future! Coal miners know they are getting regulated out by two factors. The first is that there is a massive consumer shift happening today with the market place demanding more renewable & nuclear options as the price continues to decrease and safety increases. The second is that you are digging up a natural resource that there is only a finite amount of. I mean, you are already blowing up mountains to get what you need. How long can we do this before we can’t? In a world where nothing is infinite, we should prepare ourselves in the event that the finite happens. We lose a job. Our skillset isn’t one that is required anymore in the marketplace. We’re getting out paid, out played and overstayed by some kid out of school that’s more in touch with what the consumer generation wants and needs.
This is why, the most important skill you can teach yourself in life, is how to learn. Meta-learning. According to some good random person on wikipedia, “You can define meta learning as an awareness and understanding of the phenomenon of learning itself as opposed to subject knowledge.” How do we learn? How do we adapt? How do we evolve? They say learning a second language as an adult can help prevent brain trauma after an accident. They also say it helps your mental capacities bounce back quicker and can possibly prevent or slow down Alzheimer’s. However this is more than just making yourself a better and more worldly person or preventing disease. This is about having the ability to teach yourself something new on a regular basis so you are ahead of the curve when it goes down.
Let’s take a step back and examine what we know and what we think we know. We know that change is the only constant. We think we know when things are going to change, the trends as they are happening and when a downturn is going to come. We know that technology is ever changing and having new and genuine effects on all aspects of our life. We don’t know what the effects of that technology are going to be over the long term. Remember, the internet is only 20 years old basically. That’s still so crazy to me! We have no idea what the effects of the internet are going to be over time. How do you think we know when this thing is barely old enough to drink!
We know the things we know, which means since we don’t know what’s going to happen, we have to arm ourselves with something that can keep up. If you know how to learn and especially how you best learn, you are a deadly weapon for the future! You can adapt. You can be a chameleon! You are going to be ready whenever something happens because you’ll be able to learn what it is and better yet, how to work within its constructs! I’m a believer that if you are a subject matter specialist, it’s short term good, but long term bad. What you should be is a learning specialist so you can go and compete in any business and/or life cycle.
I know this can be a little convoluted. It’s different than an exact subject, it could be esoteric. However, I hope not. Think about how you retain knowledge. Myself, I’m an audio guy. I listen to podcasts all day and audiobooks for dessert. I’ve listened to the personal MBA, over 30 famous biographies and every Tim Ferriss audiobook ever put on audio. I’ve consumed exponentially more content on audio than I ever took in from books in school. I’ve also gained a HUGE appreciation for subject matter I may have never been exposed had I not found out about this medium. I learned that I learn best through audio. There are also multiple interactive systems to help you learn. Do you want to learn a new language? Go immediately and download DuoLingo. It’s the best language learning app on the market. Moreover, there are online courses in more subjects than you could learn in a lifetime on platforms from The Kahn Academy to Harvard and MIT. Yes, they have put all of their classes on the public domain.
It’s never been easier to learn. There are delivery methods in every shape, form, and size! I think the hardest part is avoiding the noise. You don’t want people to see that you are preparing for a better future. What’s wrong, you ain’t good enough now? You don’t want people to see you fail, which happens to all of us. It’s more fun to binge watch something or pound a bottle of wine. I get it, I love TV and Zinfandel night and you can’t take that away from me! However I do think it’s time for us as grown ups to take responsibility and prepare.
You need to first prepare by learning how to prepare. Become aware of how you learn. You can start by literally googling, how do I learn? You will have a page of assessments at your fingertips and for free. If you want to try DuoLingo to pick up a new language, just do it! Go in and see if it works. Do you want to learn internet marketing? You can get a course for 40 bucks a month from digital marketing lab. If that’s still too small, go to MIT’s free courses in the public domain and see if you can learn from the same courses as our tech giants! Listen to a podcast or read a book on a subject matter you know nothing about. If it works, I think we’ve found your style!
Let’s go and start the mission now. What are you going to do so you can find out how you learn? What new skills do you want to learn so you can test these new methods of learning? When are you going to become the best version of you? I hope the answer to that is today and everyday after until my time on this beautiful planet has come to be! Best wishes friends.
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One’s Pursuit to Become a Good Man
What does it mean to want to be a good man? For me, it’s about developing the characteristics I’d admire in others.
It’s being a good father. I want to raise my son to be a good man. I want to stay in shape so I can chase him, and one day his children, around the house. I want to do the same for us future siblings. I want to be healthy.
It’s about being interesting to others and being able to strike up a conversation in any setting. I want to be connected to interesting people who challenge and encourage me. I want to feel like I’m ahead of the curve.
It’s about being proud of the way that you look. I want to have a style, I want it to be timeless and I want people to think that I care. I want to set a tone.
It’s about being a good partner. I want to be a good husband. I want to be a good partner in business. I want to be a good teammate. I want to have quality relationships in my life.
It’s about being creative. I want to pursue and create ideas. I want to turn nothing into something and have that something create an impact, be it with one or be it with many.
I want to be known as someone who is reliable. I want to be a trusted person. I want my words to be taken as an authority. I want to be known as a responsible man.
There are Principals for being a Grown Man
- Being a grown man takes consistent effort
- A grown man takes responsibility for his actions
- A grown man must know his worth
- A grown man must have the courage to confront challenging situations
- A grown man must be honest to himself and others
- A grown man is tenacious
- A grown man lives by a set of standards and principles
There are Timeless Guiding Rules for Grown Men
- Control your controllable (focus on what you can control)
- Your response to anything and everything is up to you
- Remember that you will die – live like it
- Time is the only asset you will never get back
- Invest in those around you. (You are who you surround yourself with.)
- You are the culmination of your habits
- Don’t exaggerate or imagine unknown outcomes or anticipate the unknown
- See the good in people
- Listen more than you speak
- Don’t complain, take action
- Be empathetic
- Ask questions and learn, from everyone
- Create your definition of success and pursue it
- Create your success
- Don’t allow yourself be pressured to a majority
- Be Kind
- Don’t be judging of others
- Study what other successful people have done – it’s been done before, at great scale
- Document (Journal)
- Be prepared for when things will not be good
- Don’t take things personal, even when it is delivered as such
- Be gracious in and learn from victory
- Don’t carry defeat, learn from it and move on
Being a Grown Man is Complicated and We Need to Help Ourselves as Men to Make it Less So
My Goal in this blow is to provide guidance, based on my experience and the experience of others on how to be a Grown man.
Together, we can become better fathers. Together, we can become better partners. Together we can become better Men.
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How To Be A Grown Man 